Living with close friends can be a wonderful idea because you would stay with the people you trust and those who trust you. But sometimes, it can go wrong, and that friendship might become severed for life.
Recently, someone online (we’ll call her OP) felt she was doing the right thing by helping a friend and asking her to move in with her and her fiancé. Now, things have gone sour, and she wants the friend to leave.
Here is the story.
Living Together
OP used to live with her fiancé until she discovered that her friend was about to be homeless because she couldn't afford a nice place to live.
Trying to be a good friend, she agreed with her fiancé to get a bigger place to accommodate all three of them so they could share the rent.
It seemed like a good idea, considering she’d have her fiancé and close friend in one place. Of course, not many people would be comfortable with that — I know I wouldn’t. But they agreed to do it.
So, they started living together, and they have been for a few years now. OP shares a room with her fiancé, while her friend has a room to herself.
Everything was amazing- until it wasn't.
Things Got Weird
A while ago, OP noticed that her friend was beginning to act weird and distant. When she tried to find out what was going on with her, she would avoid her, saying she was just stressed from school and work.
OP let it go, but her friend got even weirder, spending more time outside the house than she did in the apartment. Her friend would give flimsy excuses like she needed space. OP tried to do that, but she needed to know what was going on with her because it was eating her up.
Communication is always crucial. With the lack of it, OP was thinking of a million things she could have done wrong.
It got worse.
Later, her friend said she might move out when the lease was up. She tried to find out what happened to cause the sudden change, but her friend still didn't say anything. A couple of weeks passed, and the friend was still avoiding OP and disappearing without saying a word.
No Communication
OP suspects that her friend’s plans (to move in with her male best friend) might not work out because the price range for the apartments in the area they want to live in is relatively high.
However, OP is unhappy with the lack of communication and no longer wants to live with her. She is also worried that her friend might change her mind at the last minute, and she wouldn't want that.
As much as it hurts, her friend doesn't feel like a friend anymore. There’s no way to describe the feeling of losing a close pal.
OP wants to know if she'll be wrong to ask her friend to move out when the lease expires, even though she and her new friend might not be able to afford a new apartment.
Let Her Go
The situation seems sticky, but the fact that her friend wouldn’t say anything doesn’t seem right. If OP did do something wrong, she deserves to know. Unfortunately, everyone thinks that, too. She needs to let her go.
u/IncSky said, “NTA. I think the sooner you tell her, the better she can make plans. You were sc—ed over with the rent, she should have paid half, and split the bills three-way.”
Another person understands the hurt of losing a friend but concurs with everyone else.
“No. She wants to move out. You're not her mother. Sorry that it sounds like you've lost a friend, I get the anxiety there, but you WNBTA if you let her do exactly what she wants to do. Tell her straight out that she indicated she wanted to move out and that you want her to move out. End of story.”
u/jjwslot also agreed that OP is NTA, but presents different deep angles.
“NTA. Could it possibly be that she wants to move her boyfriend into your current apartment? She might be scared to ask because she knows the answer would be ‘NO!’. She might believe if she holds out long enough, you will ask her to move him in with her.
My other thought was, is she doing drugs? A new guy comes into her life. Then things start going downhill for her. That is classic drug user behavior.
But it really is out of your hands at this point. You have made your decision. The only thing she can do is tell you the truth about what is going on.
This just popped into my head. Are you sure that her new boyfriend is not your fiancé?”
End of Story
Everyone is trying to provide solutions for OP, and she has to decide what to do. However, the one true solution seems too apparent to me.
Also, no one thinks asking her friend to move out would make her jerk. After all, it was her friend that decided to move out first.
What is your take on this?
A thread inspired this post.
This article was produced and syndicated by Wealth of Geeks.
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock.
Boloere Seibidor, fondly called B.S. is a Nigerian-based writer and poet. Her favorite topics to cover include music, especially Hip-Hop, film, lifestyle, and fashion. She's been published by Feral Journal, Fantasy Magazine, The Temz Review, and most notably, Wealth of Geeks. She enjoys romantic dinners, movie nights, and touring new sites. When she's not writing, she's delving back in time to the underground world of Hip-Hop, watching TikTok, or visiting the cinema.