OP is 26 and has been dating a 24-year-old man for quite some time. She's warming up to him and thinking they could be good together. Even at the start, she could tell he was a fan of anime. She's been following his lead and getting into it as well.
He works full-time but produces anime fan art to sell online in his spare time. He explained it was his passion and would quit his day job to sketch full-time if he could. Naturally, she was genuinely curious about his work and asked to see some of his drawings. Looking through, she noticed that most of his work was mainly of female characters.
She couldn't tell how old the girls were, but it would've been easy to believe they were under 18. They were artistic, not sensual, so the drawings didn't raise any red flags right away.
But after visiting him, she's unsure if she shouldn't be concerned.
A few months into dating, OP is finally invited over to Anime Fan's house. He'd originally told her he liked to take things slow, so it meant a lot to her that he was finally comfortable moving and taking things to a new level. But that was before she saw his bedroom.
Every surface, including the ceiling, was covered in anime posters. He had one shelf full of anime figurines and another holding his manga collection. Most of the books, besides having gorgeous artwork, seemed harmless. But she noticed that with some, the girls seemed too young, their skirts too high, and shirts too low.
The ceiling was worse.
OP isn't just shocked by his love of anime but by the level of his obsession. He clearly has a life outside of anime; he plays guitar in a band and does hip-hop dancing with his community. But now OP can't help but wonder if his choice of decor is a major red flag.
“No Red Flag”
One person online explains that her boyfriend primarily draws girls because that's what sells. People buy anime girls more than anime dudes.
Meanwhile, a fellow anime lover shared:
“As a man that's in his 30s and enjoys anime, you have to consider that a lot of us don't get to decorate our space until we're on our own. We tend to go overboard when we do. Anime is fun fact of the matter, it's also a different culture to ours, and things we see as cringe are just outright normal to them (Japan has actual panty vending machines, it's real and gross).
Realistically it's not a matter of the age of the characters. Some shows include characters that look ten but are 30-year-old housewives that'll beat you with a broom. I'm not saying anime isn't sus. There are more anime I wouldn't recommend than I would, and that's coming from a fan. But any hobby that brings happiness, and in this case extra income, is a good thing.”
Don't “Yuck” His “Yum”
Another viewer thinks they are incompatible if she thinks he's weird. They advise:
“If YOU are thinking HIS interests/hobbies are “pretty weird,” then you are not for him. Leave him as peacefully as possible, and try not to bash his hobbies–just tell him y'all live incompatible lifestyles or something. Don't “yuck” his “yum,” and let him find someone who either doesn't mind his interests + hobbies, or is also into it as he is.”
What do you think? Is she overthinking things?
This thread inspired this article.
This post was produced and syndicated by Wealth of Geeks