Working in a job that doesn't bring one joy and satisfaction is hands-down one of the most spirit-draining things anyone can find themselves in, as anyone in this position can testify.
Redditor u/ThrowRAjobcrossroads, for instance, was working at a job she hated. She hated the office politics, long hours with low pay, and monotonous work. She finally found a better job, but her husband was not supportive.
And that was the catch.
Job With Benefits
Moving can affect a person in many ways and affect a family even more. This is especially true if one person wants to move because of their job, causing the other to navigate a job hunt. OP is 25 years old and has been married for two years to a man two years older than she is. When she and her husband first got married, they moved to a different place because of his job.
When they moved, she got an entry-level job in publishing, but she hated it. She rode it out for a year and a half to make it work. But well, the heart wants what it wants, and it didn’t want the job. So she started applying for other jobs.
It seemed hopeless until she interviewed for an executive assistant job she thought was superb for her. She loved every part of the new job, and the benefits were way better than her previous job.
But not everyone felt the same way about it. OP apparently didn’t know how much trouble it would raise.
More money, more problems, huh?
Husband Stands in The Way
With all these benefits of the new job, it must've shocked her when she spoke to her husband about it, and he told her he was not in support of the career change, even though it was her career.
It must have stung when she had to move with him for his career, and he wasn’t happy with her newfound job. He said the job — an assistant — wasn't professional, and he'd be embarrassed and think less of her.
She tried explaining to her husband that she was not happy at her current job and this new job offer was the best she had. She also mentioned the benefits the new job had attached to it.
But it wasn’t enough for him. He was concerned about his image, even though it was the only job she had found that made her happy. I think that puts her between a rock and a hard place where she has to choose between honoring her husband’s ego or doing what she loves to make money.
Well, OP accepted the job. But the story doesn’t quite have the storybook ending. Her husband, who was against it, is now mad at her, isn’t speaking to her, and thinks she’s terrible.
Confused and sad, she's asking Redditors if she was wrong for accepting her dream job despite her husband's reservations.
Biggest Fan, Not Biggest Critic
OP is innocent in this case, as Reddit has passed its verdict. They think her husband is supposed to be her “biggest fan, not biggest critic.” I think so, too.
u/bordennium had a few “ugly” words to say:
“NTA, and man your husband sounds ugly. You really want to settle for a partner who told you that he’ll be embarrassed by you for taking a job that’s a better fit? Come on, girl, you deserve way better than that. Your spouse is supposed to be your #1 fan, not your biggest critic.”
u/aggressively_0kay believes that if OP has a job that pays her more, there shouldn't be much of an issue. I know, right!
Another Redditor u/imothro feels that OP's husband is 100% wrong, and she needs to decide if she wants to stay with a man that says he would be embarrassed by his wife for taking a more-than-okay job. They share some deep opinions that deserve some pondering.
“NTA and your husband is flat-out wrong. I have hired qualified executive assistants as PMs in software on a regular basis, and they also filter up into HR & marketing roles. I also know exec assistants that make 300k/year. It's far from a dead-end career trajectory.
I think you need to spend a moment thinking about whether you want to be with a man that says he's embarrassed to be married to you if you take a job that makes 25k/year more than you currently make. That's a serious, serious problem.
His love and care for you seems to be entirely contingent on how ‘impressive' you are, and to me that isn't love at all.”
It seems OP has another big decision to make. Her husband was obviously not supportive and was very condescending about her dream job. Not only did Redditors agree on that, but they also agreed that the job is great.
But did she step out of line by taking the job after her husband told her he was not supporting it, or does her own happiness matter more?
Read the main story here.
This article was produced and syndicated by Wealth of Geeks.
Boloere Seibidor, fondly called B.S. is a Nigerian-based writer and poet. Her favorite topics to cover include music, especially Hip-Hop, film, lifestyle, and fashion. She's been published by Feral Journal, Fantasy Magazine, The Temz Review, and most notably, Wealth of Geeks. She enjoys romantic dinners, movie nights, and touring new sites. When she's not writing, she's delving back in time to the underground world of Hip-Hop, watching TikTok, or visiting the cinema.