Feeling jealousy in relationships is a common experience that most can relate to. Sometimes feelings of insecurity arise when a partner interacts with or favors someone else. After all, jealousy can rear its ugly head in many forms.
In this case, we see a prime example of how jealousy can cause tension and conflicts between people. While it’s natural to feel jealous sometimes, it’s essential to communicate with your partner about your feelings and work together to find a solution that works for both of you. However, this Reddit user allowed her emotions to get the better of her.
Where It All Began
OP and her ex-boyfriend, Josh, have a one-year-old daughter together. While Josh is a good parent, they don’t get along very well. After lots of fights, they finally decided to break up. Now they both only get together for celebrations.
This is a good move on the part of the parents, as a broken home is quite a lot to deal with. So, coming together for the sake of their daughter is a step in the right direction.
Prior to their relationship, Josh’s friends believed that Zoe, a girl that they all knew, would be perfect for him. Although they never dated, Zoe and Josh often spoke, which was one of the reasons OP and Josh broke up. Zoe moved away soon after but recently returned to the area following the breakup.
Blowing Out Her Candles
OP noticed that Josh was much happier since Zoe’s return and kept spending more and more time with her. When their daughter’s birthday was approaching, they agreed to celebrate it together.
Josh asked if Zoe could come along too, and while she had no reason to say no, she was not too thrilled about it. I doubt anyone would be thrilled with that, either. Who wants to see their “replacement” at a birthday party?
At the party, everyone’s attention was on Zoe. Zoe was charming and friendly to everyone, and even OP’s daughter liked her. Everyone was a little excited to see Zoe, and all the attention at the party was focused on her. Even Josh’s father wanted to meet the girl.
OP felt like her daughter was being ignored, and even when her mother tried to stir the party back in the direction of their daughter, it failed, leaving OP quite upset.
It’s one thing to have an unwanted guest, it’s quite another for them to steal the spotlight without even trying.
After everyone went out to the backyard, Zoe stayed behind and tried to be friendly with OP. However, she was not in the mood and barely responded. Zoe asked if she had done something to offend her, leading OP to lash out and tell Zoe that her presence was offensive and that she should leave.
Zoe called her a b—h and quickly whispered something to Josh before leaving. Now, everyone is mad at her because Zoe said she didn’t feel welcome.
OP wonders if she’s the jerk in this situation. While it’s understandable that she would feel jealous and ignored, lashing out at Zoe was not the best way to handle the situation. After all, Zoe had nothing to do with the breakup between her and Josh.
u/mojikipie thinks OP’s feelings are valid, and we agree. But the emotions shouldn’t be all you act on.
“Don’t feel too badly, OP. Your feelings are valid. And although you could have handled it differently, you were pretty triggered in the moment. Just maybe apologize at some point for taking it out on her at the moment. If she and your ex get together officially, you’ll be in a bad spot if you maintain your stance of not liking her.”
u/blahdeblahahah understands just how difficult watching a former lover move on is and how the emotions might cause a few sparks.
“This sounds really hard. Watching your ex move on is no fun, but you will need to accept it and find people who love and support you. On the bright side, another adult to care for and about your daughter could be helpful to you; if Josh is happy, that’s good for you too. And you’re still young… Zoe may seem awesome, but anything could happen with her and Josh. It won’t be all smooth sailing for any of you. Take the high road!”
While OP’s feelings are valid, her response to Zoe was inappropriate. She should take this as a lesson and try to be more understanding and respectful of other people’s feelings in the future.
Have you been in this position before? What do you do when it feels like someone is stealing your spotlight?
This thread was inspired by this post.
This article was produced and syndicated by Wealth of Geeks.
Boloere Seibidor, fondly called B.S. is a Nigerian-based writer and poet. Her favorite topics to cover include music, especially Hip-Hop, film, lifestyle, and fashion. She's been published by Feral Journal, Fantasy Magazine, The Temz Review, and most notably, Wealth of Geeks. She enjoys romantic dinners, movie nights, and touring new sites. When she's not writing, she's delving back in time to the underground world of Hip-Hop, watching TikTok, or visiting the cinema.