There's no denying how captivating and thrilling romance can be. When done right in books or movies, it can leave fans teary-eyed, staring wistfully into blank space, and wishing for that fantastical life. Still, it is not beyond misinterpretation.
Through books and movies, certain ideas about romance have become embedded in our culture. Now, when we enter into relationships, we must shout down the expectations set by fiction to live in (and enjoy) reality.
1. Once You're in It, It's Happily Ever After
According to every romance story ever, the point of your quest is finding your partner. Once you've secured a significant other, you get your happily ever after. Nothing else matters. But the truth isn't so saccharine and simple. Relationships and love are constant work.
2. Grand Romantic Gestures Is The Best Way To Win Someone Over
Grand, public romantic gestures aren't as romantic in real life as fiction would have you believe. If the other person isn't happy to be on the receiving end of the gesture, it can lead to epic humiliation for both parties.
One person on Reddit called for one exception to this rule, however. According to u/PhreedomPhighter, public romantic gestures are actually a good idea if you're already in a long term relationship. “It's a good way to keep the passion alive,” they wrote.
3. It's Okay To Be a Stalker if You're Hot Enough
No, it's not. But when romance books and movies constantly show stalking as acceptable behavior — as long as you're a hot, rich guy.
“I didn’t get your address when we randomly met in the Starbucks,” one person joked on Reddit, “so I had my security team run your fingerprints and I found your apartment!'”
Someone else asked: “Isn't that the plot for 50 shades of Grey?”
4. All Men Want Is Sex and All Women Want Is Emotional Support
“This leaves women feeling like all they need to do is be super cool about sex and guy will basically fall in love with them. Likewise, guys think all they need to do is act like they want to listen to a woman's problems all day and she'll be dying to f–k his brains out at his whim,” u/zazzlekdazzle says.
“In reality, men and women want both, and neither put a lot of value on relationships where sex or kindness is used transactionally.”
5. Mere Proximity Necessarily Fosters Romantic Attraction
This Redditor explains the trope better:
“Best friends for life will fall in love at the end. Coworkers who never hang out outside of work will fall in love at the end. A captive who spends the entire runtime in a cage eating wet dog food will fall in love with their captor as long as their captor stays just a few inches on the other side of the bars.”
Well, a hopeless romantic can dream.
6. Unrequited Love Can Become Requited if You Try Hard Enough
“That pursuing someone long after they said ‘no' or ‘not interested' will change their mind, and is itself a highly romantic gesture that will certainly be appreciated,” u/Shadowwynd says.
Someone adds, “Particularly movies in which this underdog protagonist intentionally sabotages a perfectly okay relationship in order to be the usurper. It's not romantic; it's sociopathic.”
7. Love Is All That Matters
“Love is all that matters. Like that busy business woman who has family problems and has to win the big account can have every issue go away just by getting d—ed down by the right man,” a user says.
8. That You Need Love To Be Happy
u/Hiraeth-Fern shares their personal experience:
“Ah, what I wouldn't give to worry about relationships later in life than force myself to have a crush cause I felt abnormal for not having those feelings at 13. (Yes, it's as stupid as it sounds.)
I didn't understand romantic feelings or things of that nature until I was 19, and yet I would force myself to date and the garbage that comes with it while feeling nothing at all, just so I wasn't left out.”
9. Quick Flames
“That a three day torrid affair with someone you never see again is preferable to a 30 year relationship with someone you enjoy sharing your life with. See The Horse Whisperer or The Bridges of Madison County,” u/HMouse65 shares.
10. Couples Can Work Through Anything
u/fingerpaintswithpoop begs to differ:
“Sorry, but no. Some people just aren’t meant to be together. Some people fall out of love as easily as they fell into it. And sometimes, despite the best efforts of both members of a couple trying to reignite the spark, it just… dies. It doesn’t have to be either of their fault, but at some point you have to accept that you and your SO are no longer right for each other, and it’s time for you to part ways (romantically.)”
As one of the earliest and most famous genres, fans think it is essential that creators who aim to center their art around it represent the right message through their works.
You can read the original thread on Reddit.
This article was produced and syndicated by Wealth of Geeks.
Boloere Seibidor, fondly called B.S. is a Nigerian-based writer and poet. Her favorite topics to cover include music, especially Hip-Hop, film, lifestyle, and fashion. She's been published by Feral Journal, Fantasy Magazine, The Temz Review, and most notably, Wealth of Geeks. She enjoys romantic dinners, movie nights, and touring new sites. When she's not writing, she's delving back in time to the underground world of Hip-Hop, watching TikTok, or visiting the cinema.