Love, Money, and Misunderstandings: How Income Differences Destroyed This Couple’s Relationship

When she first met him, she asked about his job and his money, he was very vague in response. All he told her was that he worked part-time. But who can afford to live on their own with just part-time work? She looked past it, but it started to bother her as the months went by.

Moving in Together

They moved in together about six months in and split rent and bills, £650 between the two of them. He's had no problems making his side of the payments, but he barely works while she's busy working full time. He hardly does anything. So, she opened one of his pay-slips that came through the mail. It was shocking to find out that her boyfriend earns anywhere in the region of  £1250- £1350 for barely 20-25 hrs a week.

The Confrontation

She wonders how that is even possible. But more importantly, how is it fair that they had to split the bills when he earns way more than she does? He earns more than she does for full-time work at a minimum wage of 40 hours per week in the UK.

She confronted him about it and asked him to pay more rent, more on the bills, or more towards shopping, but he freaked out and asked why should he? He hasn't responded to her messages or phone calls for a couple of days now. She’s wondering if there’s anything she can claim from him.

Claim What?

Redditors are gobsmacked about her feeling entitled to claim something from her boyfriend. One Redditor expresses their surprise by exclaiming, “Claim!” They pointed out the flaw in OP's thinking, saying that her boyfriend didn’t lie about anything and his finances are none of OP’s business.

They pointed out that moving in together and splitting expenses in half was a mutual agreement. And questioned why they both failed to talk about finances.  They didn't fail to call out OP’s sneaky behavior, describing opening his mail as “psycho,” “illegal,” and “a shit thing” to do.”

Another said that asking him to pay more rent is only okay if he's offered to split things differently. According to them, just because someone makes more doesn't automatically mean he's supposed to pay more rent. It should be a team decision. They think that the real reason OP feels entitled is that she’s pissed that she’s making less, and that's not on him. “You don't get to “claim” money from him just because you're dating,” they said.

Someone else commented that it's not OP’s boyfriend's fault he makes more than OP. Unless OP is struggling to survive, in their opinion there's no reason it shouldn't be 50/50. “You're not entitled to his money unless you guys have a legal commitment to each other,” they wrote. “If you get married one day, then that would be a different situation, they conclude.”

Finally, Someone Understands!

WildlifePolicyChick thinks OP’s boyfriend is dishonest and advises her not to date such a man. She wrote: “Now that you know he makes significantly more money than he let on, he's taking advantage, (in my mind. He misled you to his financial advantage. Don't date (or live with) men who do this. You can't trust him.”

This was the comment the OP needed to validate her hurt, her shock, and her need to be compensated. OP replied, “Thank you, this is just the response I was after, I knew it didn't sit right. If I knew he made more money, I'd have never offered to split the bills.”

You can read the original story here

This post was produced and syndicated by Wealth of Geeks.




Amaka Chukwuma is a freelance content writer with a BA in linguistics. As a result of her insatiable curiosity, she writes in various B2C and B2B niches. Her favorite subject matter, however, is in the financial, health, and technological niches. She has contributed to publications like Buttonwood Tree and FinanceBuzz in the past and currently writes for Wealth of Geeks.