Birthdays are a special occasion for many individuals, marking another year of growth and memories. It's a day dedicated to celebrating the person and showing them how much they are loved and appreciated.
However, unforeseen circumstances can sometimes disrupt even the most meticulously planned birthday celebrations. OP, u/Due_Independence9316, faces this dilemma as she grapples with whether or not her decision to prioritize something else over her boyfriend's birthday makes her a terrible person.
Here's What Blew Out The Candles
OP and her boyfriend had been together for a year and a half, with his 40th birthday coming up. OP had never liked big parties, or put much importance into birthdays, as her family put little an effort into any birthday parties when she was younger.
Her boyfriend decided they would have a weekend getaway instead of a party. They made plans to go to Napa for the weekend and spend quality time together. While it wasn't exactly what her boyfriend wanted, he was willing to settle for the Napa trip.
OP's best friend had moved across the country a few years ago, and she had just given birth to a daughter. OP was expected to be present for her baptism, as she was to be the godmother to the little girl. She booked a flight to attend the ceremony, excited to be with her friend on such a special occasion.
Putting things together, she realized that the baptism was the same weekend as her boyfriend's birthday weekend. He was quite disappointed when he found out that she had booked a flight. He was also sad as she had double booked, as they had already made their bookings for the Napa trip.
On Thursday, OP was talking to her friend and realized she would be letting her down by not attending the baptism. With only a few family members scheduled to be in attendance, her best friend needed her there.
What Are Her Options?
She decided to change her plans and attend the baptism and called her boyfriend to tell him she had changed her mind about Napa. He argued that it was too late to get his money back for the Napa trip and that they would lose money either way. He had already taken Friday and Monday off and would prefer it if she stayed. OP stuck to her decision and took her boyfriend to dinner to celebrate his birthday.
Her boyfriend seemed to handle it well and enjoyed dinner with her. However, things took a turn for the worse when OP told her boyfriend she wouldn't be spending the night with him and would be heading straight to the airport after dinner. He became visibly upset and left in a huff. OP called her own Uber and left for the airport the next morning.
“I was kind of upset with the way he acted, so I texted him Happy Birthday, but didn't talk to him otherwise.”
Upon arriving at her destination, OP met an army of angry texts from nearly all of their friends. Her boyfriend had gone out with some of them to celebrate his birthday since she wasn't there, and when they found out why, they were all furious. They think OP is a complete jerk for leaving her boyfriend without plans for his 40th and for canceling at the last minute.
Redditors Weigh In
u/sheramom4 firmly believes that OP is TA, as her boyfriend tried to make things work for her, but OP was unwilling to do the same.
“YTA. You don't like big parties, so he couldn't have one? He went out of his way to accommodate your wants for HIS birthday, and you dropped him at the last minute. In fact, you barely acknowledged his birthday at all and made sure every minute of it was about you, even his birthday dinner. And then have the audacity to complain about the way he was acting.”
u/Petty-Penelope also believes that OP is TA.
“YTA, for sure. Being out of the flight is your own problem for double booking. You let him continue with Napa plans afterward, only to change your mind at the last second. Then to make it even worse, you booked his apology dinner on a night you can't fully celebrate because of the trip you've planned that has f—ed him over, and want a gold star for it? The least you owe him is to pay for whatever he's out for the trip and a massive apology.”
One can be caught in a rock and a hard place when they have to choose between two important events on the same day. They would have to choose which one is a higher priority for them. Redditors don't think OP made the right choice. Do you think she did?
Read the main story here.
This story was produced and syndicated by Wealth of Geeks.
Boloere Seibidor, fondly called B.S. is a Nigerian-based writer and poet. Her favorite topics to cover include music, especially Hip-Hop, film, lifestyle, and fashion. She's been published by Feral Journal, Fantasy Magazine, The Temz Review, and most notably, Wealth of Geeks. She enjoys romantic dinners, movie nights, and touring new sites. When she's not writing, she's delving back in time to the underground world of Hip-Hop, watching TikTok, or visiting the cinema.