Sometimes even a happy occasion needs to take a backseat for someone grieving. One person is learning the truth about grief and consideration, as not many are sympathetic to her issue. Here’s the story.
The Bachelorette Party
The original poster, OP, is soon to be married and went with her cousin to a bachelorette party trip to New York City. According to OP, there were eight women total in the group. Knowing how expensive destination events can be, OP asked her guests to cover their own flights and hotel. She planned on paying for everything else.
On the last night in town, OP made early dinner reservations so the friends could enjoy dinner and another activity later in the evening.
OP says that her cousin mentioned wanting to go to the cemetery to visit her late husband's grave, and OP agreed, stipulating that she'd like her to be back in time to go to dinner.
Dinner reservations were for 5 PM, and at 4:30, OP and a couple of the other girls tried calling her cousin, but she didn't pick up. Finally, when Haley showed up, it was closer to 6. So, OP talked to her after.
“This was supposed to be a girls' trip,” OP says she told her cousin, “Not so she could go running off to do her own thing.”
OP says her cousin got pretty upset, and when they flew back the next day, she stayed quiet. However, OP admitted her sister told her their cousin was crying on the flight home.
Now OP wonders if what she said makes her a jerk.
People Speak Out
@coastalkid92 had the top comment and thinks OP should grow up. “OP is absolutely in the wrong. I can understand that this was your bachelorette but read the room. It wasn't like she went off to pay respects to a dead celebrity buried nearby. It was literally her husband. Show a bit of compassion.”
User@9-1-fcking-1 thinks OP's upcoming wedding could have brought Hayley some painful memories. “And I’m sure the friend seeing OP getting ready to get married dredges up old painful memories of her own wedding and DEAD husband…whose grave she just visited…for the first time in who knows how long.”
@Strange-Bed9518 thinks OP is so cruel she's not even worthy of forgiveness. “Yup, a more tone-deaf, all-around unpleasant person is a rare find. I don’t think you can even claim bridezilla here. The fact your widowed cousin is celebrating you should humble you, not induce you to kick her when she is down. YTA, big time. I wouldn’t forgive you if it were me.”
Have Some Compassion
Whether OP is narcissistic or suffering from a bad case of bridezilla isn't apparent from the story. However, everyone agrees she could have handled her cousin Hayley's circumstances with much more grace and compassion. So, what would you have said to Hayley if you were OP?
This thread inspired this article.
This article is produced and syndicated by Wealth of Geeks.